His Wooden Heart (Repost May 2015)

I had promised him

The last time

That I wouldn’t breakdown

Wouldn’t crumple to the ground

In a pool of tears

Some promises were hard to keep

And so I broke it

It hurt to fail him

For I had always kept the pain in

Remained strong, so he knew

So would see me as brave

That he wouldn’t have to feel

He had to take care of me

My eight year old son

Felt he needed to protect me

And that hurt

For I wanted him to be a child

As long as he could

To not let the world make him jaded

To experience the world

Through naïve and hopeful eyes

Instead, he watched me

Sitting in the dark

Head in hands

Body shaking from the pain and the tears

Regretting only that I couldn’t hold myself together

Until he went to bed

My son found a wooden heart

At the bottom of his toy box

He walked over to me

Placed the wooden heart against his chest

Then placed it on mine

His big brown eyes watched me

I wiped the tears away

And held him close

For I knew what love was

I took the heart and slipped it in my pocket

For it held his love and his strength

I would keep my son close

Carrying his wooden heart in my pocket

Wherever I went

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