Heart Springs

Springs have shattered in my heart

Leaving the cogs to spiral

Completely out of control

Gears and wires all seem to be hanging

My hands are covered in incomplete sentences

No matter how much I try to punctuate

My tongue clatters in my mouth

Leaving me silent, watching

As all my words come spilling out

Emotions dangling in each tear

I wish I could blame you for this

That every word you enunciate

Has left me unraveling

Each spring, gear, coil breaking and falling

The truth is I am already broken, damaged

And over time the wearing

Has finally reached my heart

Poem for the Old Lady that Lived in a Shoe

She had always wanted to be a mother

For as long as she could remember

So took them all in

Friends, family, children and pets

 

Until her home was overflowing

With kindness, laughter and mirth

She had been blessed with a big heart

And gentle hands

 

So they all come to live

In her little house in the shape of a boot

She makes sure they are warm

She makes sure they are loved

 

In a world of misplaced hearts and broken toys

People tend to hurt more than loved

So she will be their mother

Doctoring wounds and soothing pain

 

Knowing, we will never understand

Everything she gave freely

but understanding

we knew she always had an open door

X’s and O’s

She signed everything

With x’s and o’s

Each scrawled beautifully

At the bottom

Of random scraps of paper

Tucked in lunchboxes

Slipped into back pockets

Sealed in envelopes

With her own words

Advice and encouragement

Her name followed

By x’s and o’s

Saved each note

A portrait of her love

Collected in a shoebox

With every drawing

Every letter

And I remember her love

With every x and every o.

Letting Go

Letting go

Two words

I should

Embrace more

But caught

At the

Let part

So never

Really get

Too far

So now

I am

Lingering on

This thought

So maybe

It is

Time for

Me to

Let go

Starting with

This poem

Trust

He said let go

Trust me

For I won’t let you fall

Let yourself unravel

Just a little tonight

Then maybe you will fly

If you can trust me

To help you land

So let go he told me

Soft whisper coiling around my ear

Let myself unravel

Just a little tonight

So that I can fly

Let the night embrace me

And trust him

To catch me at dawn

I need to learn to let go

Let myself unravel

Then maybe I could learn to fly

Morning Routine

Morning falls on deaf ears

Or quiet mouths

And we just sit staring at the clock

Pondering out thoughts

Waiting for the caffeine to finally hit

We shift into our daily routine

Cogs turning out the mundane

And we all are caught in our own prisons

With four walls and a chair

Just some have a better view

Or a nicer set of curtains

Predator and Prey II

Boys have been predators

For as long as I could tell

And why should they get all the fun

I think I should take a crack at it

 

Keep an eye on me

Lingering in your doorway

Watching you, holding my intentions

Nestled in my back pocket

 

Swaying in the dark,

I will be your own personal ghost

Pulling you closer and closer

Until I find your breath has tangled with mine

 

Look me in the eye, while you trip over my smile

Touch is a dangerous thing

And my fingertips are the deadliest weapon

Teasing you into my darkness

 

I will let you stumble

Trip over my words, until you are falling

Over me

Onto the floor

 

Leave you in the outline of my shadow

Searching for my smile

Missing my touch

Craving the sound of my name upon your tongue

 

Boys have been predators

For as long as I could tell

And why should they get all the fun

I think I should take a crack at it

The Sky Fell

The sky fell away into the horizon

The clouds spilled down

Until you could almost taste them

Sun filtered through the rainy days

For once I could remember what light was

The chaos of Monday is forgotten

Heart racing with every second

I feel alive

I feel awake

Looking up, I am ready to fly

Gather the sky as my cape

Journey where the clouds begin

And where the sun ends

Chaos Found Her

Chaos was tattooed on her inner thigh

And sometimes

When she is dancing

You can find it lingering in her smile

Twinkling from the corner of her eye

As she twirls around, around

Arms up, fingers tickling the spinning lights

She sways in time with the music

And a part of her unravels slowly as the song continues

If you look closely, you can find her

As she slowly falls apart

And you almost want to collect her and all her pieces

Hold them close as the night continues on

And she just keeps spiraling around, around

Feeling like if you stop watching, you will let her go

To disappear into the shadows

Fall away into the night

She had chaos tattooed on her inner thigh

And sometimes

When she is dancing

You find it knotted around your wrist

Tugging you in slowly

Until you can’t breathe and find yourself

Swaying away to the beat of the music

Taste her on your mouth

Feel her in your hands

As she sways to the music

Slowly unravelling with every song

Makes you want to gather her up and all her pieces

Hold them close

Pulling her away from the edge

Hiding her from the chaos that she always seems to chase

Tell

This definition is vague you tell me, you tell me that you could never really see me caught in all the smoke and shadows of my words, you tell me I need to be stronger and brighter to stop hiding behind open doors and shouldn’t let my ideas get reduced to written messages in fogged up windows you tell me that I am lost, fading in an outline caught snagged on the darkness I should smile more then maybe you could see me completely that I shouldn’t hide in the obscurity of my words, my language you tell me,  you tell me my definition is too vague and leaves our meetings bittersweet for you can never completely interpret my body language as welcoming, you tell me I am blocked within my mind and you can’t see me that I am vague lost in the shadows of my words, you tell me, you tell me

That you can’t see me

Maybe I am vague, because you never learned to read me and see me between the lines you have confined me in maybe this outline is only of your design and I need to tell you, tell you maybe you are just blind lost in your own thoughts and actions stumbling along trying to build the world into your definition let me tell you, you never could find me because you never bothered to stop and listen to my words never follow their path to understanding me so you are standing there with a blank look and empty hands, and I am telling you that you cannot see me because you choose to be blind and build me into a vague outline for it is easier to see me in the definition you created than to see me for who I really am I am telling you

That you will never see me